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Allow me to be frank at commencement.
You are not going to like me.
The gentlemen will be envious and the ladies will be repelled.
You will not like me now and you will like me a good deal less as we go on.
Ladies, an announcement
I am up for it, all the time.
That is not a boast or an opinion it is bone hard medical fact
I put round you know, and you will watch me putting it around and sigh for it.
Don't.

It is a deal of trouble for you and you are much better of watching

and drawing your conclusions from a distance than you would be if I

got my tarse up your petticoats.
Gentlemen, do not despair.
I am up for that as well, and the same warning applies.
Still your cheesy erections till I've had my say, but later when you shag,

and later you will shag, I shall expect it of you and I will know if you have let me down.
I wish you to shag with my homuncular image rattling in your gonads
Feel how it was for me, how it is for me
And ponder
Was that shudder that same shudder he sensed?
Did he know something more profound?
Or is there some wall of wretchedness that we all batter with our heads at the shining live long moment?

That is it.
That is my prologue.
Nothing in rhyme, no protestations of modesty.
You weren't expecting that I hope.
I am William Control
And I do not want you to like me.